What I am posting here is something I wrote for a speech I gave at my friend (and great songwriter/performer), Emily Bell's series "Can't Talk Back." Each week she has a guest woman speaker come up in the middle of her band's set to talk about what it means to them to be a woman. I put a little twist to it. Check it out :) It was incredibly inspiring for me to get up in front of about 50 people (mostly men) and talk about this truth of mine.
I just had my 29th birthday and over the past few years I have gone through some life changes and transitions that I feel have catapulted me into my womanhood. Through hardships and certain situations I have grown. Being a songwriter, I keep finding lyrics pouring out of me about coming into being a grown woman.
There have been times where I have doubted my ability to speak out. It’s much easier for me to put some lyrics to a song and play my guitar or piano and sing what I want to say. Now I will speak out.
I want to start by sharing a brief history of my pubescent teenage years with you. To begin with, when my parents finally gave in and let me start shaving my legs, I was in 6th grade, long after all of the “cool girls” in school started shaving theirs. Not many girls can say this, but MY DAD actually took me to the store and helped me pick out a cool razor, I still remember the way it looked, round and flat to make it easy to hold. It was pink or purple. He taught me, with patience and care, how to shave my legs around my nobly knees and tender, skinny shins. A few years later when I started my period, I was too ashamed to tell my mom. So I would take feminine hygiene products from my best friend, Tarah’s, house in order to avoid an awkward conversation. She had never talked to me about this stuff, and I was certainly not going to be the first one to bring it up. I went months without telling her, she finally found out and we still never really had a conversation about it. Now, in retrospect, I understand it must have been uncomfortable for her as well.
This was my introduction into the beginning of womanhood. And I had feelings of shame and embarrassment.
What I have learned since then is that there is nothing to be ashamed of here! Being a woman is so beautiful, mystical, spiritual, vulnerable, sexy and powerful. Just like Mother Nature, we nurture the sick and dying and encourage the blooming. Our hearts carry compassion and love. And when our hearts are open, we can dance freely to the beat they are providing us and follow our path of courage.
Someone reminded me recently that all humans are made up of part masculine and part feminine energy. So I am not only speaking of what it means to be a woman, but what it means to be a human. Each and every person on this planet has the ability to connect with the Divine Femininity and soft, flowing, nurturing side of themselves. Just as much as they have the ability to connect with the strong, grounded, "get shit done" part of themselves. When I say this, I am not separating men and women, but combining the two amazing forces that we all have indispensable access to.
So, the message I would like to convey is that we all have the Divine Feminine and Divine Masculine inside of us. Each side wants to be expressed just as much as the other whether you are a woman or a man.
A woman carries the baby that the man fertilizes, just as the rain from the skies give life to the plants and trees that grow from the earth’s inviting soil. We need both to thrive!
With this message, I encourage you, whether you are a man or a woman, to reach inside and find what it means to harness both feminine and masculine energy.
Men, I urge you tonight and in the future to dance and wave your arms in the air letting your worries and fears float up to the sky. I urge you to ask yourself how you are expressing the feminine nature that undoubtedly rests in your spirit.
Women, I encourage you to reach far and wide out of your comfort zones, just as I am doing right here right now on stage. Do something to nurture your masculine side. Fix something at your house that you might normally ask a man for help with. Find that part of your spirit that yearns to take care of yourself and loved ones in your life.
You are all beautiful people. Thank you for listening to my truth and I urge you all to live yours. Thank you. The Divine Mother in me recognizes the Divine Mother in you.