Hey! I'm playing at The Saxon Pub Friday evening, late show at 12:30am after Jeff Plankenhorn! It's gonna be a fun time and I will have some great players backing me up! I'll be there, will you?
Lately this question has been coming up in and around me. Why do I want to play music? What do I want to do with my ability? When I start to answer, I know what the feeling is, but I can’t seem to put it in to words. I will do my best to do this now.
For those of you who know me well, you know that I have a strong faith in God, the Universe, a power and a light in every thing. It lives in all of us and is easily covered up by ego, fear, resentment, etc.. When we are hurt or disillusioned it is our ego that tells us “this is not fair,” “I am a victim.” I have been faulty of this as every human has. Because we are human, we have the ego. With faith, each day, each moment I strive to listen not to what my ego has to say, but what my truth is.. It can be extremely difficult! I have read a lot of books on spirituality and guidance on inner truth that have showered me with the knowledge I have in my brain on this subject. What I have taken from almost every piece of literature I have read is that truth is inside each of us, always. It is there regardless of whether we wish to hear it or not. Layers of fear (whatever they may be for each individual) grow over the truth masking it, fogging it and suffocating it. Somehow we grow to find comfort in this. We grow to find comfort in being a victim. We learn how to feel good in this state for whatever reason.. Maybe attention or excuses to be destructive to our selves or others or excuses to not be the best we can be and so on. This can turn into a vicious cycle.. Or not.
We can choose to be happy. We can CHOOSE to LOVE ourselves.
I am not preaching something I have not struggled with. I am not throwing a pity party, I am simply saying that if we are human we have issues. Everyone does. The more we can access the love for ourselves, the more we give our pure, honest, good love to others. And also accept love from others. It’s a beautiful thing. So let’s work on loving one another and ourselves with whatever we do in our daily lives. Move forward gracefully (or not, it’s okay to be clumsy) with intention. I believe if we instill this in our daily practice, we will uncover our truth and feel a divine sense of freedom.
As I sit here and write, it’s helping me on my own path. I have no idea how many people will read this. I’m sure my mom and a few of my friends. I am not writing this to get recognition though. I am writing this for myself. It feels so liberating to put my truth out into the world for anyone who will listen.
This is why I play music. Music is so dear to me and so true in my heart. Music holds me when I need to be consoled, music lifts me when I’m creeping away from truth, it grounds me when I’m feeling heady, it loves me when I can’t seem to find a reason to love myself, speaks to me when I’ve closed my ears to the divine. In return, I respect the music and lyrics that choose my Being to move through. I feel so honored and blessed by this.
Through music I vow to..
love all in this Universe. The divine light in me recognizes the divine light in you.